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The Colonel and the Muse

9 Nov
muse leira and lala

Lala Drona (right), and Muse Leira (left)

What Lala Drona wrote had the tendency to come true.  Fortunately (and unfortunately)  for her, all the desires and dreams that she had written had already come true, and she was now living them.  Lala lied alone in her bed and thought about how creation comes from a lack, and how a satiated writer isn’t much of a writer at all.  Lala thought about what she wanted.  What did she desire?  Perhaps it was world domination, perhaps it was to get the art laboratory  back in business.  Whatever it was, it was in that moment that Lala realized she wanted nothing more than to be lying next to someone else.

 

The story of Muse Leira

In 18th century Portugal, in the small town of Messejana, Colonel Morgado died and left his estate to his four servants.  His loyal and dedicated Muse, grew depressed from the lack of creative collaboration with the Colonel.  Over the years that followed, the battle strategy notebooks and plans they created together disappeared,  buried in dust.  Muse Leira refused to occupy any other room after the Colonel’s death and condemned herself to those four walls for eternity.

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Messejana, Portugal

It wasn’t until recently, three centuries later, that Leira had the opportunity to dust off her inspiration projectors and collaborate with artists visiting the Colonel’s room.

 

The last servant left alive in the house decided to move into the house next door and rent out the Morgado home.  A young couple moved into the house with their baby, but made a point to stay out of the Colonel’s room at night, as recommended by the previous owner.  Muse Leira haunted the room at all hours, but her image only appeared at night, when she had the power to touch the tenants of the room.

The couple converted the house into an art residency, inviting international artists from

Screenshot 2018-11-09 at 18.51.43

Colonel Morgado’s room

around the world to visit and work on their projects.

 

Winnie was the first to stay in the Colonel’s room.  She was an ink-landscape painter from China.   The lights constantly switched on and off and the bulbs burned out.  Winnie saw Muse Leira for the first time on the night of the new moon.  She could not sleep and when she opened her eyes and rolled over, a head covered in a white cloth bag stared straight back at her.  Needless to say, Winnie left the residency early.
Madeleine was the next to stay in the Colonel’s room.  She was an abstract expressionist painter from France.  She began work right away on the first day and filled the room with canvas and color.  When she woke up the first morning, she saw that all of her t-shirts and pants had been thrown on the floor.  But no matter, she submitted to the strong inspiration that boiled from within and jumped out of bed to continue painting. 70_year_old_art_supplies_by_kymmacaleb-d492xvm.jpg

Night fell and while working at her desk, Madeleine tipped over a bottle of varnish.  She desperately looked for a cloth to absorb the liquid and took one that was handed to her.  She dabbed the painting with no result, and looked down at the cloth to find it was one of her t-shirts from the floor.  She looked to her side to see who handed it to her, and Muse Leira stood there, wearing all of Madeleine’s clothes and giggling.  After a bit of an awkward meeting, Madeleine and Leira became good friends and collaborated easily for the remainder of her stay in the Colonel’s room.

After Madeleine left, the room grew cold again, the air stagnant without the flow of creative energy.  A week went by and artist Lala Drona, an American painter living in Paris,Screenshot 2018-11-09 at 18.51.05 moved into the Colonel’s room.  On the first day, Lala rearranged the room to take advantage of the light coming in from the windows.  Lala’s painting materials still hadn’t arrived and she felt herself growing weak from the lack of creation.  She woke up in the middle of the night sick with a cold.  The roosters crowed and the dogs barked outside, rattling the bed she slept in.  Lala found the strength to approach the tissue box in front of the mirror on the other side of the room.  She grabbed a tissue and while blowing her nose, she looked into the mirror to find the head covered in a cloth bag standing behind her.  Lala would have screamed if she hadn’t lost her voice.

Muse Leira ran across the wall and knocked a trapped door open before hiding in the corner.  Realizing Leira was a muse, and having had extensive experience with muses, Lala tried to calm her while tiptoeing towards the trapped door.  Inside, Lala found old paintings on paper—portraits of the Colonel and his servants.  Further inside, she found charcoal.IMG_3345

Lala started coughing and Muse Leira led her back to bed.  Muse Leira brought over a board with paper and the charcoal and sat next to Lala.  She set up the drawing board and Lala began sketching out ideas for paintings.  She thought about what she wanted.  She thought about the relationships she had had with the Drones (assistants in her former art laboratory), other artists and muses.  Muse Leira reminded her that it is those relationships which make Lala human.

 


Over the next few days, Leira nursed Lala back to health.  Leira inspired Lala, and Lala grew stronger with every collaboration.  Lala’s painting supplies finally arrived, and thanks to Muse Leira, she is now off to a strong beginning.

Based on a fact.

Kendal Dreges, Minisota Artlife Press

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Radio Interview with a Visual Artist

8 May

Lala Beijing Radio 2018_BOAF.png

Lala Drona in her first ever public radio appearance on Beijing International Radio.  Listen to her interview on Touch Beijing 93.2FM, where she explains what it means to be a visual artist today, and how Beijing has inspired her art.  Stay tuned until the end where she reveals her plot for the future.

 

The Tarot Unfolds: Lala relocates to Beijing

21 Dec

Lala in Beijing

At the end of 2012, Lala arrived in Paris in search of inspiration for her paintings and world creation.  Along with inspiration, she also stumbled upon success, as gallery owners and collectors found her work groundbreaking.  She felt like a star, but all things have an expiration date…

One cold day in February 2013, while on her way to an event, Lala took a violent fall on the subway station stairs in Paris.  This painful welcome to Paris left her with a broken tooth and knocked unconscious.  Her friends rushed her to an emergency hospital where dentists repaired her teeth by sealing the cracks and capping the lateral incisor.  However, the trauma she suffered would have lasting effects far beyond this.

In the summer of 2016, Lala travelled from Paris to Sedona, Arizona and visited a medium.
The medium read the Death card, a card denoting change…the death of one thing and the beginning of another.  Lala took the card quite literally, and rushed funeral arrangements, creating plans for her last tableaux, a funeral installation displaying her body in her coffin, breasts exposed, surrounded by flowers.  Needless to say, Lala’s reaction was an overreaction, as she probably wasn’t really going to die, but still, Death wasn’t going to let her get off that easy.

In November 2016, while rehearsing her next performance piece “Phalanges revitalisation,” she felt a sharp pain around her nose and front teeth.
The pain was unbearable and her Drones took her to an emergency dentist.  The dentist found that both of her incisors were “necrosées” (necrotized, dying).  Lala underwent a “devitalisation,” a procedure where the dentist drilled holes into her teeth in order to kill the nerve and disinfect each tooth.  The dentist then filled in her two teeth like mummified bodies.  A literal Death, foreseen in the cards.  After the three-week long procedure, Lala’s teeth felt back to normal again, but, Death’s influence had just begun. teeth-2016-png-jpg (text continued below).

Towards the end of 2016, due to too many failed art experiments, and Lala’s plunging media presence, investors in Paris pulled out from financially supporting Lala, leaving her with a large debt from which to recover.  With the Lala Laboratory destroyed, and Drones scattered around the world, Lala’s artistic success seemed ill-fated.  All her efforts were futile, and Lala at her lowest, went out to the bars in Paris, and danced another deadly dance with red wine and the Paris underground.  In the tunnels of the Paris subway, she tripped on the stairs and fell again, hitting her head on the wall.  The next morning, Lala woke up in the Paris subway with a jarring headache, and a beeping coming from her phone.   Lala looked at her phone to find an email from a group of investors in Beijing, China.  They were fascinated by her work and were inviting her to relocate her projects to their home country.  A drastic change, presented itself.  As foreseen in the cards, the beginning of one thing,  and the death of another.  Lala hastily accepted the project.

She is calling out to all Drones in Beijing, as her estimated time of arrival is mid-March, 2017.  She will spread her Drone empire, rebuild the Lala Laboratory, and resume her art/Muse experiments.

It seems the Death card has closed its chapter on Paris.  Lala’s accident on arrival in Paris caused her teeth to slowly die over the 4 years she has spent there.  Now that her teeth have finally perished, so has her time in Paris.  A promising future awaits, as Lala will soon begin her next chapter in Beijing, China.

Based on a fact.
Alisa McQueen, Art Tomorrow Weekly Magazine



NO MORE DRONES!

27 Jun

Lala stands in front of the crowdProspective Drones everywhere lined up on the warm-lit cobble-stone streets of Paris, for the premier of The Drones Video Project 2016.  Sporting their sunglasses, the crowd chanted Drone Code, in hopes of meeting the artist and enlisting in her Army of Drones.  Frequently at these events, one can find recruitment booths manned by the official Drones buzzing words like “transcendence,” “higher purpose,” and “transformation” into prospective recruits’ ears.   However, this time, there were no booths, no official Drones gathering the masses.  Wewantyou-001

A Lala-shaped roar formed from the people’s mouths when Lala Drona and her 35 official Drones came out from the doors of the Opera Garnier, where the Drone Video Project had just premiered.  Cameras flashed onto the black mass that consisted of the Drones and Lala.  They made their way down the red carpeted stairs, each step followed the crowd’s chanting: “Drones will be loyal to Drones, Drones will be loyal to Lala.”

When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Lala Drona lifted her hand to silence the public.  She looked to Drone Ember, standing on her right.  Drone Ember stepped forward and looked at the hundreds of warm bodies standing in front of her, her head still slightly tilted towards the floor.  She stared the public down through her black industrial glasses.

“On behalf of Lala Drona and the Drones, I would like to thank all of you for coming out, and supporting our mission to reach creative potential.”  The Drones behind Ember were a black stone wall, a fortress sandwiching their art queen, Lala.  Cameras continued to flash and click.  “However, it is to my greatest regret to inform you that Drone Recruitment has been closed.”  Drone Ember raised her voice, speaking over the mob’s gasps and whispers.  “We currently do not know when Drone Recruitment will reopen, and we apologise for any inconvenience this may have caused you.”Drone Ember

The disgruntled crowd shouted and booed as Drone Ember returned to Lala’s side.  The art authorities forged a path through the crowd, and Drone #1 took Lala’s arm, leading her and the other Drones down the human-made aisle.  The 35 official Drones surged through like blackened blood through a vein, and in an instant, Lala and her Drones vanished somewhere on the other side of the crowd.

See the Drones Video Project 2016 below:

EXPLOSION!: Lala Laboratory, no more.

9 Jan
Explosion survivors-001

(from left) Lala Drona, Drone #1, DJ Mafe and Drone Olchin under 24 hour surveillance at Paris Plaza Hospital.

Authorities scramble to find the culprits behind the Lala Laboratory bombing.

Three days ago, Lala was tried in court and forced to disclose the locationMuse sweatshop. of her secret underground laboratory. Courts issued a warrant permitting the Art Guild to search the laboratory premises where they found
incriminating evidence of Lala’s unethical, not to mention illegal, art and inspiration experiments on Muses.

Yesterday, the building was evacuated, leaving approximately 70 Muses and Drones homeless.  Authorities say that Lala was not found inside the laboratory during the sting operation.  However, it turns out that during the event, Lala Drona and her selected entourage (Drone #1, DJ Mafe and Drone Olchin) went 100_0697-300x225into hiding in a secret wing of the laboratory, one that does not appear in Lala Laboratory architectural plans. Le group played a congenial game of poker throughout the night.

At 2am, authorities received word of an explosion in distric 94.  The Lala Laboratory had been bombed.

Drones alerted the authorities that Lala Drona and her entourage were trapped inside.  Six hours later, search and rescue dogs sniffed out the group.  Lala described the event:

“There was a terrible ringing in my ears as I looked for my companions. I maxresdefault.jpgfound DJ Mafe first, who told me that Drone Olchin and Drone #1 were trapped behind a door wedged shut by a large scolding pipe. There was yelling on the other side of the door. The walls were caving in. Mafe and I pushed the pipe up and out of the way, freeing the Drones.” Mafe and Lala Drona obtained 2nd and 3rd degree burns on their hands from the ordeal.

CHINA-ACCIDENT-BLAST

Search and rescue teams successfully removed the group from the rubble at 2:20PM, 12 hours after the bomb had gone off. They are currently being treated at the Paris Plaza Hospital in the 4th arrondissement under 24 hour surveillance, as they are now considered a security threat.

Damages to the lab were irreparable. They include the destruction of all current art projects, Lala’s current manuscript, and administrative material such as gallery contracts and invoices for artwork sold. All progress made on Muse inspiration extraction research has been lost.Screen Shot 2016-01-09 at 16.37.46.png

The authorities have asked that you contact them at
drona.lala@gmail.com
if you happen to find any fallout from the explosion (documents or laboratory notebooks). Authorities are specifically interested in finding a small laboratory notebook with the words “Lala Laboratory” written on the cover (photo on left).  The contents of this notebook are considered to be highly dangerous and the notebook is thought to play a crucial part in solving the laboratory bombing case.

Based on a Fact

Reese LeFevre, freelance journalist

 

Acrylic to ink: Lala quits on the art world

15 Dec

Lala writes bookLala Drona’s latest art show was cancelled due to “pornographic material.” Lala Drona was scheduled to show her series “Sexe sans Sex” at local Parisian gallery in Momartre, when the gallery owner sent her away after taking just one look at the risqué series. Lala told Paris Paint Magazine that her agent had already sent the material for review by the gallery months ago, and it seemed as if everything was fine. There must have been some sort of confusion, because not 20 minutes after Lala’s arrival, she was seen leaving the gallery with her assistant David, canvases in hand.

Minuet

“Minuit” from series Sexe sans Sex.

The owner of the gallery claimed he was unaware of the painting’s pornographic nature. He finished with, “I myself love the paintings, but my clientele wouldn’t be very happy if they came in with their families and saw [the paintings].”

 

In response to the situation, Lala Drona stated, “The series is Sex without sex. There is no pornography in these images. That’s exactly the point of the series…” She finished the statement by saying that her and the gallery were simply not a good fit, and would probably never work with them again due to artistic differences.

Lala transports canvases            For the moment, Lala Drona does not have additional gallery showings on the horizon. However, the artist told Paris Paint Magazine that she’s taking a step back from the art world in order to write her book about the Lala World. “I’ve already finished the outline and am currently writing the second chapter.” Based on a Fact wonders if the sudden step back from the art world is due to the recent gallery rejection, however Lala Drona assures us that she will continue to paint. “People forget that I’m a fiction writer just as much as I am an artist.  Politics and career pressures have kept me in the gallery sphere since arriving to Paris.  Painting is half of my heart, and of course I will not abandon it, but I’m ready to retreat into my writing again.”

As far as the book goes, Lala Drona is not revealing much about the content, but she has said that she’s writing some sort of origin story. Fans everywhere are on the edge of their seats waiting for the highly anticipated book.   Likewise, Based on a Fact is excited to learn more about the secret life of Lala Drona.

Based on a Fact

Henry Martin, 40, Paris Paint Magazine

Nominated for Work on Damon’s Head

22 Oct
Lala Drona's head prosthetic earns her a nomination for this year's SDA awards.

Lala Drona’s head prosthetic earns her a nomination for this year’s SDA awards.

In recent news, Lala Drona is claiming her work on Matthew Damon’s head.

Nominations for the bi-annual Screen Development Awards have been announced. Lala Drona, the first female fine artist to be nominated for the award, was selected for her work “The Tree of Life” on Matt Damon’s head in the 2013 film Elysium.

Lala Drona and Matt Damon after the awards ceremony.

Lala Drona and Matt Damon after the awards ceremony.

Every two years, the SDA awards artists for advancements in special effects make-up technology. The SDA aims to promote art in special effects make-up in an era where computer generated effects dominates the industry.

However, complaints were filed not more than one hour after Lala Drona received her nomination for the award. Now that the demand for special effects artists has hit a low, it seems that only major players in the industry are able to stay afloat. Since Lala Drona’s piece “The Tree of Life” was a product of the Lala Laboratory, some say the SDA should also take action to promote and support independent artists.

One of Lala’s fans is surely not complaining. Matt Damon accompanied Lala Drona to the nomination ceremony, where sources say the duo were reprimanded for incessant giggling and whispering during the announcements. Damon revealed that he decided to keep Lala’s prothetic implant intact under the skin of his skull even after finishing the movie. He’s a big fan of Lala’s and says that he likes the idea of being “a walking piece of art.”

Based on a Fact
Helen Peters, journalist at Pop Prothetics Magazine

Academia brings back Paper Goblin

31 Jul

EICAR Rumors to the reason why Lala Drona has been off the radar have finally emerged.  Lala Drona has recently finished a screenwriting/directing workshop at L’école des métiers du cinéma et de la tv / The International Film & TV School – Paris  (EICAR ).  Along with other writers and film directors, she studied the art of screenwriting and directing films.  When asked about her incentive to take the course at the EICAR, she explained that she is researching different media in which  she can bring the universe she is creating to life. However, the artist hasn’t completely dedicated herself to the reel just yet.

Je suis... exhibition.  Facebook page  https://www.facebook.com/www.jesuis.xyz?fref=ts

Je suis… exhibition. Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/www.jesuis.xyz?fref=ts

On the contrary, the course has inspired her to write the first book based in The Lala World.   “The Lala World is a world rich with details integral to its existence.  It deserves a book before it’s adapted to film,” she said.

Paper goblin

Paper goblin

While taking the screenwriting course, Lala Drona wrote her first screenplay, a short film called “Tape Monster.”  The screenplay is inspired by the self-portraits she is currently painting for the Je Suis…

exhibition (taking place this October at The Maison des Ensembles) and by the Paper Goblin created in 2013.  “[The film] is about identity.  About accepting your inner monster and collaborating with it in order to create something beautiful.” The film “Tape Monster” is set to be released by the end of September 2015.  Shutupi is rumored to be the director of photography on set, and Lala Drona is said to be working with a prominent figure in the music industry for the soundtrack. Based on a Fact Tina Flint, student at Western College of Film Studies

L.D. Times Interview: Art Games

23 Jun

After her debut in L.D. Times Magazine last year, Lala Drona appears again, revealing her Muse tendencies.

Click to see the full article

Click to see the full article

STOP MUSE TRADING! Artists speak out.

19 Apr

STOP MUSE TRADING

Artists are rising up and speaking out against “unfair” Art World legislation. After the Muse Strikes last year, the Art Guild granted Muses union protection in order to avoid the exploitation of their services to artists. Since legislation passed, thousands of Muse Service Provider companies have emerged, stimulating Art World economy and reducing the number of Muse Abuse reports.

Although Muse abuse reports are at an all time low, artists and muses across the globe are claiming that Muse exploitation is in fact rising. Since the birth of the Muse industry, new requirements for Muse education program certificates have limited low income Muses in their job-search.

Lala Drona and Lans Thorne teaming up against the Art Guild.

Lala Drona and Lans Thorne teaming up against the Art Guild.

Muses with unconventional inspiration tactics have been pushed aside due to Muse Service Provider’s strict selection process and standardized health tests. Many young and inexperienced Muses are being forced to sell their services on the black market, a place where union support is obviously not granted. “If Muses want to report abuse to the authorities, they’ll be thrown in jail for participating in the black market,” states artist Lans Thorne. “This explains the decrease in Muse abuse reports.”

Strict regulations on Muse services have also negatively affected the artists. Due to mandatory full disclosure contracts, artists lack a level of privacy and trust required to create with their Muses. Strict time regulations impede the artistic process. Even if the Muse would like to prolong the meeting with his/her artist, he/she cannot due to a breach of contract.

As legal Muse service prices have sky-rocketed, low income artists have also been forced to search for their Muses on the black market. Artists like Fred Le Chevalier have begun to speak out against the system that exploits Muses for their services. “The muses aren’t paid as well as they should be under these service providers. All the money goes to the company and to [the Art Guild] in the form of fees and taxes.”

Lala Drona and Fred Le Chevalier teaming up against the Art Guild.

Lala Drona and Fred Le Chevalier teaming up against the Art Guild.

What seems to be troubling Lala and other artists the most is the increase in illegal Muse trading. “Yes, I torture and abuse my Muses, but I’ve never done anything against their will. The increase in Muse trading is a direct consequence to an overly regulated and ridged system that makes the rich richer.”

Lala has teamed up with other Parisian artists in the aim to change Art legislation. She was caught last week discussing tactics with Lans Thorne at his exhibition This Synthetic Life. In addition, Lala was spotted making peace with artist Fred Le Chevalier at his current exhibition in Paris. Are these artists teaming up in order to bring the Art Guild down? Does Lala really want to save the Muses, or is this a petty attempt at revenge against the Art Guild convicting her to Art Prison? Stay tuned as things start heating up in The Lala World.

Based on a Fact

Angela Goodall, Journalist at A-Musing Magazine

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