Archive | January, 2016

EXPLOSION!: Lala Laboratory, no more.

9 Jan
Explosion survivors-001

(from left) Lala Drona, Drone #1, DJ Mafe and Drone Olchin under 24 hour surveillance at Paris Plaza Hospital.

Authorities scramble to find the culprits behind the Lala Laboratory bombing.

Three days ago, Lala was tried in court and forced to disclose the locationMuse sweatshop. of her secret underground laboratory. Courts issued a warrant permitting the Art Guild to search the laboratory premises where they found
incriminating evidence of Lala’s unethical, not to mention illegal, art and inspiration experiments on Muses.

Yesterday, the building was evacuated, leaving approximately 70 Muses and Drones homeless.  Authorities say that Lala was not found inside the laboratory during the sting operation.  However, it turns out that during the event, Lala Drona and her selected entourage (Drone #1, DJ Mafe and Drone Olchin) went 100_0697-300x225into hiding in a secret wing of the laboratory, one that does not appear in Lala Laboratory architectural plans. Le group played a congenial game of poker throughout the night.

At 2am, authorities received word of an explosion in distric 94.  The Lala Laboratory had been bombed.

Drones alerted the authorities that Lala Drona and her entourage were trapped inside.  Six hours later, search and rescue dogs sniffed out the group.  Lala described the event:

“There was a terrible ringing in my ears as I looked for my companions. I maxresdefault.jpgfound DJ Mafe first, who told me that Drone Olchin and Drone #1 were trapped behind a door wedged shut by a large scolding pipe. There was yelling on the other side of the door. The walls were caving in. Mafe and I pushed the pipe up and out of the way, freeing the Drones.” Mafe and Lala Drona obtained 2nd and 3rd degree burns on their hands from the ordeal.

CHINA-ACCIDENT-BLAST

Search and rescue teams successfully removed the group from the rubble at 2:20PM, 12 hours after the bomb had gone off. They are currently being treated at the Paris Plaza Hospital in the 4th arrondissement under 24 hour surveillance, as they are now considered a security threat.

Damages to the lab were irreparable. They include the destruction of all current art projects, Lala’s current manuscript, and administrative material such as gallery contracts and invoices for artwork sold. All progress made on Muse inspiration extraction research has been lost.Screen Shot 2016-01-09 at 16.37.46.png

The authorities have asked that you contact them at
drona.lala@gmail.com
if you happen to find any fallout from the explosion (documents or laboratory notebooks). Authorities are specifically interested in finding a small laboratory notebook with the words “Lala Laboratory” written on the cover (photo on left).  The contents of this notebook are considered to be highly dangerous and the notebook is thought to play a crucial part in solving the laboratory bombing case.

Based on a Fact

Reese LeFevre, freelance journalist

 

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